Terry and Anita's Story
Terry and Anita’s Story of Hope Through Foster Care
What motivated us to become foster parents is that fact that we love being parents! Between the two of us we have nine children. We know that being a parent is not an easy job; a stressed out parent might be more likely to abuse or neglect a child. When a child has to be removed from their home, we want to provide a safe place for them to stay. We have several friends who are excellent foster parents. Watching them interact with their children made us realize that we could foster too.
We have been foster parents for a little over a year now. So far we have cared for three children, a sibling group. When they came to us the oldest was 17 months old and her sisters, a set of twins, were 5 months old. The twins were medically fragile as a result of being born premature. When they first came we had to take them to as many as four doctors’ visits a week. Anyone who wants to be a foster parent must be prepared to sacrifice time and energy for the sake of the children. The welfare of the child MUST come first.
The main "downside" of foster care for us is not knowing how long the children will be in our home. It doesn't take long to grow attached to children. After all, you are providing 24 hour care just like you do for your biological children. We pray a lot not only for the children, but for their parents as well. It is not hard for us to give ourselves wholeheartedly to temporary care. When you stop and think about it, even our biological children are going to leave us one day, and we still love them unconditionally.
We believe in maintaining a good relationship with the birth family if that is possible. We show them the same respect that we would like to be given. We do not bad mouth them to their children, so that helps in the reunification process with their parents.
For those who want to foster, but are reluctant because of the prospect of saying goodbye; please don't let that stop you. There are children who need to see that good parenting is possible. They need to know that all adults won't hurt them. Take these children into your home, love them and care for them as if they were your own; you won't regret it. Our whole family has benefited in so many ways from the fostering experience. We have seen our children grow emotionally and spiritually as they tend to the needs of others.
We are fortunate to have found an agency that offers excellent support. Bethany Christian Services has been wonderful! They are especially helpful in the area of attachment issues. Lanna our Bethany case manager, is always accessible to us whenever we have any questions. We appreciate the fact that Bethany is a Christian organization and they share a lot of the same beliefs and values that we do. Most importantly they believe, as we do, that every child has a right to a safe and loving home.
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