11/16/2009

Adoption and Identity

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A long awaited study on adoption identity formation was recently published by the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute.  A New York Times article about the study can be found here. A full study summary can be found on the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute website by clicking here.  We encourage every adoptive parent to check out this excellent study.  Also, adoption workers are encouraged to study the findings and consider how best to prepare families for the unique issues of identity formation their adopted child will face.  We greatly appreciate the time and effort spent on this wonderful resource.

11/10/2009

November 10, 2009 Second DNA at the US Embassy

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Due to an inquiry made with the US Embassy in Guatemala City, we have been told that they are not processing 2nd DNA tests at this time.  It is our understanding that this essentially halts all adoptions in Guatemala at the 2nd DNA test.  

We have been informed that they are in the process of reviewing the process of 2nd DNA tests. We will update information as it becomes available.

11/04/2009

November 2, 2009 National Adoption Month

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Did you know that NOVEMBER is "National Adoption Month" in the United States?

The History of Adoption Month (taken from "NACAC:" North American Council on Adoptable Children) Formalized, time-specific adoption awareness campaigns originated more than 20 years ago. In May 1976, Massachusetts Governor Michael Dukakis issued the first state Adoption Week proclamation, and President Ford then officially proclaimed the week in a letter to the North American Council on Adoptable Children (NACAC) conference held later that year. As years went on, Adoption Week came to be observed during the week of Thanksgiving in November.

In 1986, NACAC helped coordinate a national "Calling Out" event based on an idea from Larry Gellerstein, then president of the Adoptive Parent Committee of New York. That year groups across North America braved late November weather and simultaneously assembled on state and provincial capitol steps to read statements about waiting children, and call out the names of waiting children in their state or province.

In 1990, NACAC decided to expand opportunities for raising awareness, and began advertising Adoption Week as National Adoption Awareness Month (November). The idea has quickly caught on, and Adoption Month has celebrated ever since.

In 2005, a Presidential Proclamation of November 19 marked "National Adoption Day" where thousands of children across the United States have their adoption finalized in court!  

CELEBRATE ADOPTION !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

09/14/2009

Guatemala Independence Day

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September 15 is Independence Day for Guatemala, Costa Rica, El Salvador, Honduras and Nicaragua.  Mexico’s official Independence Day is on September 16 though the celebrations begin the night before. After 10 years of a revolutionary war in Mexico, Spain granted Central America its freedom from colonial rule in 1821.  With the growth of the Hispanic population in the US, September 15 is increasingly celebrated in US cities. Holidays in Guatemala are a time for families, children and entire communities to gather  and celebrate with parades, music, and special food and of course, as is the case with all holidays in Guatemala, with firecrakers in the streets.

08/13/2009

Guatemala update

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When adoptions closed in September of 2007, Bethany as well as many other agencies had cases that were pending.  There are about 900 Guatemala adoptions among US agencies pending completion.  

Bethany has three cases being completed.  All have been approved and one of these families has traveled this week to bring their child home. We celebrate these adoptions and are grateful to the families who have worked with us and been faithful to their children during the difficult and long process.  We are also grateful to our Guatemala team and the all the work they have done over the years for the children in need of homes.

Bruce Mossburg traveled to Guatemala in July to explore the possibility of expanding our work to provide child protection services for the many orphans and children at risk in Guatemala. According to UNICEF children make up more than 50% of Guatemala’s population. About 3.7 million children live in poverty and in rural areas about 80% of Guatemala’s children live in poverty and nearly 50% of the Guatemala’s children suffer from chronic malnutrition.  Please keep Guatemala, its children, and the various ministries working in Guatemala in your prayers.

07/31/2009

7/30/09 Families Helping Families Celebration

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07/15/2009

Wednesday, July 15, 2009 - Guatemala Survey

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Several families who are still currently in the adoption process in Guatemala completed a survey through Joint Council. Joint Council now has this information available on their website. Here is a link to the Guatemala page: http://www.jcics.org/Guatemala.htm.

06/10/2009

Wednesday, June 10 - Fiesta Guatemala in Michigan on August 22

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FIESTA   GUATEMALA!!
HOLA, AMIGOS! You are invited to our eleventh annual FIESTA GUATEMALA

WHEN? Saturday, August 22, from 12-5 P.M. – Lunch at 1 P.M.

WHERE? At Jeff & Nancy Bykerk’s home, 9350 Byks Lane, Caledonia, Michigan
Byks Lane is located south off of 92nd Street between Patterson & Kraft
Please park on the east side of Byks Lane or on 92nd Street.

From East/West, take M-6 to Exit 15 & go south on M-37 to Kraft.
Turn right on Kraft. 92nd Street is about 2 ½ miles south. Turn right on 92nd Street.
From north/south, take U.S. 131 to 84th Street Exit & head east to Patterson, about 6 ½ miles.
Turn south/right on Patterson to 92nd Street where you’ll turn left.
(Contact Nancy if you need further directions.)

WHAT DO I BRING? Please bring either a salad/watermelon/fresh fruit, if possible.
(We’re expecting around 100+ people.)
The main course, chips, dessert, drinks & table service will be provided at a cost of
$6/adult (15 & older) and $3/child (age 3-14 years).

Swimsuits for a dip in the pool plus ball gloves, shin guards, rollerblades, hockey sticks...

We’ll need 3 to 4 pinatas for the different age groups; just let me know if you can bring one. Thanks!

WHO’S INVITED? Anyone, really!
These invitations are being sent to families who have adopted, are in the process or are interested in
adopting children from Guatemala through Bethany Christian Services.
However, if you know of a family who has adopted from Guatemala from another agency
or is even considering adoption, please, invite them!
Also, families who have children of a different ethnic background are welcome,
since many of us also have children of other ethnic backgrounds.
Representatives from Bethany will be present along with many adoptive parents who are more than willing to answer your questions or listen to your concerns.

WE LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING YOU!
...But we need to know ahead of time if you’re coming so we can plan the food, drinks, etc.
Please, mail the section below to the Bykerk’s with contact info, # attending & check to cover costs.
 Questions? Please call Nancy @ 616-891-7878 or 616-450-9138.
Thanks!






Name:____________________________________________ Phone #______________________
# Attending_____________                                        Amount enclosed $________________

Mail to: Nancy Bykerk, 9350 Byks Lane, Caledonia, MI 49316

06/05/2009

Friday, June 5, 2009

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Joint Council has requested that we post the following information for families who have or still in process of adopting from Guatemala.

Dear Colleagues,

As stated in yesterday’s posting by Hannah Wallace, families and friends committed to the children of Guatemalan will launch the Guatemala 900 Campaign on June 17th in WashingtonDC.  The launch of the campaign will include a rally, speaches, a march from the White House to the Capitol and a candlelight vigil at the Guatemalan Embassy. 

While not officially affiliated with Joint Council, the Guatemala 900 Campaign has a goal in parallel to the ongoing Joint Council Guatemala 5000 Initiative: a family for every Guatemalan child.  Joint Council has and will continue to work with many of the campaigns organizers and we fully support the goals of the Guatemala 900 Campaign.

On June 17th, the Guatemala 900 Campaign will become a voice for the 900 children whose adoptions have yet to be completed despite 18 months of investigations, court hearings and interviews.  The campaign will advocate with the U.S.and Guatemalan governments to ensure a quick and final resolution of all cases and an end to the victimization of Guatemalan children.

Joint Council asks that all Members distribute information on the Guatemala 900 Campaign and to lend your support to this effort.  Detailed information can be found at www.guatemala900.org  

05/06/2009

Wednesday, May 6, 2009 Happy Mother's Day

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This year, Mother's Day is Sunday, May 10th... HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL MOTHER'S AND ALL MOTHER'S-TO-BE!
                               
A picture named M2


..... although not officially on the calendar as a holiday, did you know the Saturday before Mother's Day is celebrated among the adoption community as "Birth-Mother's Day?"

A "BirthMother/First Mother" is the name given to a woman who conceives and biologically gives birth to a child who is relinquished or placed for adoption.

The adoption constellation involves many people (extended family, support, etc), but the triad consists of three points.  The three-points of the triad are: the child, the Adoptive Mother (or Adoptive Family) and the BirthMother (or BirthFamily), in no particular order.  Without one of these "points" the triad would not exist.  The relationship among the three sides is inter-related and inter-dependent.  All three sides of the triangle are of equal length.  All three should be celebrated equally!  Many Christians believe that as we are all God's adopted children, this adoption triad metaphor reflects the Trinity of our Father.

What are some ways that we as adoptive families can honor our child's BirthMother?  Internationally adopted children with little to no information about their BirthFamily oftentimes "fantasize" about where they come from and who their BirthFamily is.  In adoptive families that openly discuss the child's birth-country, BirthParents, and birth-culture, the children as adults report having a more positive self-esteem and self-worth.  Some parents encourage their children to write a letter to their BirthMom/BirthDad on these special days or even their own birthdays.  What is most important to remember is that each child has their own feelings about their BirthParents.  As Adoptive Parents, the best we can do is provide a safe and open place for discussion.

Different ways to "honor" or "celebrate" birthparents:

-Light a candle on special days.
-Say a prayer for them.
-Make a special page in the child's Lifebook to celebrate the BirthParent(s).
-Write a letter to your child's BirthParent(s) and put it aside to share with your child later.
-Write a letter/make a card jointly with your child for the BirthParent(s).
-Read age appropriate books together.
-Talk about what the BirthParents may look like.
-Celebrate unique talents that the child may have... and attribute them to the BirthParent(s).

Some adoptive families may not be comfortable talking about the child's BirthFamily or adoption.  Your child will perceive this level of being uncomfortable and may learn to be ashamed or fearful of the discussion.  In order to build a healthy relationship that is based on trust, it is important to be open with your child about their adoption.  If these discussions are open and supported from the beginning, your child will grow to learn that their adoption is celebrated, not hidden.  Your child will be proud to be adopted and will be able to honor their BirthParent's with Thanksgiving!

The book I Wish for You a Beautiful Life (Yeong & Yeong Book Company; ISBN 0-9638472-3-6) is a compilation of letters from Korean BirthMother's to their relinquished children.  Each letter is very unique and provides a glimpse of the different cultures and emotions that this choice has created, related to separation and detachment that a BirthMother may experience and/or express in writing.


As a Mother (whether through birth or adoption) of a child... whether your child is with you, with God, living in China or yet to be born... Bethany Christian Services and the Guatemala Team wish you a warm and loving "Happy Mother's Day."
 We also keep in prayer the BirthMother's that give Life to these precious children and love them enough to want for them, what they cannot provide.  These women too, should be celebrated, honored, and given Thanksgiving.  Their struggles and choices are immeasurable and we may never know them, but we do know them in our hearts.  We pray that they are safe, loved and at Peace.  

*In this Blog Post, we use the term "BirthMother" to refer to the woman who conceived and birthed the child whom was then adopted.  There are other terms such as: "First Mother" or "Biological Mother" or "Genetic Mother" to name a few.  The PC world of language and adoption is sensitive and we mean no offense to any particular term mentioned or not mentioned.